Darling

You thought I'd play the game. You thought I can play the game. You thought I usually play the game. Even with that image of me in your mind, I took the risk and refused to back down. You wouldn't have dated me if you knew I'd be in for the real thing, would you?

I'd be the sweet, wonderful, easy-going person you liked the first few weeks of us being together. Because darling, if I've got one shot at Mr. Right, I'm willing to take the risk. And yes, I have to be happy for the remaining days in our calendar.

You are my first boyfriend. My first kiss.

Darling, I just have to tell you that before you leave. Not that I want you to go back to me, but I just want to show you that despite my coldness, my defense mechanism of protecting myself...I really wanted you that much to give you everything of me.

You

I love you, darling. And I haven't even told you that.

Mantra: I am an attractive, loving person and so are you. We are in love. You love me. We will live together forever. We will be happy forever.

Funny

Me: We're going somewhere to meet someone for something.
Him: Who are we meeting? And why are we meeting him?
Me: Him/Her, I don't know yet. Because I need that person for something.
Him: So you need me to be there when you meet this person you haven't even met before?
Me: I don't NEED you. I WANT you to be there. I want your opinion.

Him: Is it a preacher? A priest, or anyone associated with church or any religion?
Me: HUH? HAHAHA! No! Don't worry, it has nothing to do with long-term commitments.
Him: It isn't about long-term commitments! With all those questions about religion you were asking me then!

----
Me: It's a surprise!
Him: I don't like surprises! I already have a lot of bad experiences with surprises, and they usually involve women!
Me: Okaay.
----
Me: Mot...Hai
Him: Hello :)

wired in a different way

Aug 17: First Monthsary

Me: I got my hair cut yesterday, and you didn't notice.
You: I'm bad at that!
Me: I got my legs waxed, AND you didn't notice.
You: OH, I DID!

Wow. :D

Aug 20: thank you for driving me home at 7 in the morning. haha.

Aug 25:
i was taking it seriously. i shouldn't have.
maybe we just have different ways of showing that we care for each other.
for me, it's taking initiative.
for him, it's giving me control.

Sleep-over: I was sick, and although you expressed your disgust over my trash - you gave me tons of tissue paper just to make sure I'd be okay. Thoughtful in some weird way. :)

Aug 26:
If there's a soulmate for everyone, then I've found mine! :)
I just have to look at the really sweet things that he does for me.

Would it?

Would it really kill you to hold me every time we're together? At least for a week before you leave for China?

Dating vs. Bf-Gf

I just realized, the difference would be the "L" and "C" words - Love and Commitment. And we never acknowledged those:

1. No "L" words so far.
2. No certainty about our future.

Am I being too clingy?

Why do I need reassurance from time to time?

1. Because you never really showed affection for me in front of people we know. You never announced it, and you never seemed to see the importance of defending my position or of our relationship. You don't flirt, but you don't defend.

2. You never told me you love me. But I know you care, I know you do.

3. Because I don't know what will happen next. I just want to hold on to you as long as I can, as much as I can, because I don't know until when I can do that. Will I ever see you again?

L-O-V-E

Do you love me, darling?
You've never told me that you do.
With 13 days left in our calendar, I should be getting nervous.
But I'm not.

Do you see a future in us?
We are attracted to each other, you know that.
And I miss you so today.

We've been mentioning those 3 words in connection to other people-
Not us.
We make fun, we make jokes.
Because there's this fear inside us -
Does the other person love us?

you're different!

You - white skin, gray hair, brown goatee, green eyes, and a red tattoo! :)

te echo de menos

I miss you!

After 16 days of seeing each other everyday, today is the first day I'm not going to see you. 16 days! 2 weeks and 2 days! I want to see you...NOW. But I have lots of work to do. And I think we need a little break from time to time.

Do you miss me too? :)

sweetest things

August 5, 2010 Thursday

After my meeting, I tried to call you, and ask you to pick me up tomorrow after my class. There was something wrong with the connection, and our calls always get cut off.

Then I was walking to Hoan Kiem lake, and I passed by a Photo Exhibit entitled "Today's China". It was a decent exhibit - neat, clean, organized, and nothing frilly, but the pictures were awesome. Aside from the title and the name of the photographer, there is not a lot of information. After nearly completing the round, I texted you and you came right over. By then, I already completed 2 rounds, counted the pictures, and written on the dedication board/book. Haha. :) You came over, and I did a third round with you. You also wrote on the dedication book.

Had lunch, and went to a bookstore after. Over lunch, you told me:

1. You got coffee (not 3-in-1)when you did shopping yesterday. You don't drink coffee.
2. Also got eggs (for breakfast - I always have breakfast, and you never do. haha).
3. That I should come over and watch over your shoulder so you'd do all the things you should do - upload photos, etc. That it's a pretty good reason for me to come over.

You want me to move in? Because I really like you, and you like me too! :)

sweetest things

This morning:

1. You said "I love you" in such a whisper, I still doubt whether I heard it right. I asked you again, and you said a different thing. Haha.
2. You said I have to bring an overnight bag next time.
3. You kept asking if I like your place. I do, darling. Yes, I do. :)
4. You said you still have the chocolates in your fridge, and that I've got a reason to come back.
5. You said you'll think about me when you're watching Glee.
6. Indirectly, you're saying you want me to hug you.
7. You asked if I want to stay in Hanoi for another year. What was I thinking when I said No?

I'd rather not say the word

I am not confrontational so I'd rather send you an email rather than talk to you in person. I was rather offended that you think I'd go for money. It is tempting but I already thought about it before, and when a person thinks s/he can have everything s/he wants anytime, that offer becomes less tempting. I can work - I don't need it, I don't want it.

Btw, I posted some pictures of our trip on my FB. And no - there is no indication of you and I are going out as a couple - or whatever we are, I don't know. I am a poor uneducated provincial girl - I don't know the game, nor the rules. I am just a girl who happened to like someone who also happened to think that I'm just in for the fun and treat. Oh wow. We're both bored and we have time. And apparently, you think you have something you can give me and vice-versa - a mutually beneficial relationship.

I do not tolerate polygamy on either side, and I'd be out of the picture if you decide to follow the rule - When in Rome, do as the Romans do.