Vacation

I'm dreaming of taking a vacation soon...with you...after all the things I need to do are finished.
I want to tell you so many things, but I'am afraid you don't even want to listen to me.
Do you ever want me? Like me? Want to be with me?  You never ask me how I am.  You never ask questions about me.  I end up telling you all about myself.  In defense, I am just rationalizing my behavior - me talking to you about myself is partly in hope for a reconciliation, and also partly for my own sanity.  You are someone I can discuss with, and give advice.  By telling you my plans and my intentions, I am also reinforcing them in my mind - that I really have to do those things at the time frame I have stated.  It also makes me more structured, and more organized.  By thinking first about those things which I tell you, it forces me to think/plan through it.  So, thank you...somehow.

I dream we are together soon, and we like each other's company.  I doubt if you ever had good friends, and if you still communicate with them.  Or are you a lone traveler now and you don't want to settle down and make friends?

I love you, without any rush, without any definite time frame of being together, without wanting commitments.  I have changed from before, where I was setting ultimatums just to see if you would respond.  I guess I matured (or just grew tired) from my previous relationship.

I just hope I do get to finish the taxes tomorrow!  It will be one pain in the neck to get rid off!  You have such a carefree life compared to mine.  But I anticipated this.  I had fun during my solo traveling.  It's time to work hard now! and learn a lot!